Palo Alto, CA – The debate surrounding the potential side effects of 5G technology took an unexpected twist this week. A groundbreaking study conducted by the prestigious TacoTech University in Silicon Valley claims that exposure to 5G radio waves results in an irresistible craving for tacos.
Dr. Ekon Carnecille, the lead researcher on the project, shared his findings at a press conference while generously handing out taco coupons. “Our research indicates that 5G waves resonate at a frequency remarkably similar to the human body’s natural taco craving center located in the medulla oblongata,” stated Dr. Carnecille, wiping salsa off his chin.
The World Taco Organization (WTO) was quick to respond, declaring a state of emergency and doubling its production of soft and hard shells. The organization’s spokesperson, Ms. Lada Enchil, expressed her concerns. “It’s a double-edged sword,” she sighed. “While we’re thrilled about the spike in taco consumption, our primary concern remains the well-being of the world’s cilantro and lime supplies.”
Telecom giants have been surprisingly supportive of the findings. In an unforeseen partnership, leading companies like Verizon and T-Mobile have started bundling unlimited taco deals with their family plans. A leaked memo from an unnamed source at AT&T suggested a potential merger with Taco Bell to form “AT&TacoBell” with the tagline, “Connecting your call and your cravings.”
On the other hand, burrito enthusiasts are crying foul. The United Burrito League (UBL) released a statement claiming, “It’s a conspiracy to undermine the supreme reign of the burrito. We demand equal representation in this supposed ‘research’.”
Several Silicon Valley employees shared their experiences. “Every time I walk past a 5G tower on my way to work, I just have this insatiable need to munch on a taco,” claimed one software engineer. Another mentioned, “I’ve switched to a 4G phone and now suddenly crave burritos. It’s all very confusing.”
Meanwhile, conspiracy theorists are having a field day. Rumors are circulating that 6G, currently in development, may result in an urge to binge-watch Mexican telenovelas.
As the 5G-taco saga continues, fast-food chains are seeing lines stretching all the way to parking lots, and the depletion of hot sauce stocks. Only time will tell if our digital future is destined to be flavored with spicy salsa or if this is just another hard-to-digest finding.
Disclaimer: This article is satirical and intended for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to real studies and technologies is purely coincidental. Remember always to check which network your phone is connected to when having food cravings.